So you're going through a Divorce! Should you Get Counseling?
COUNSELING AND REFERRAL SERVICES (ACRS)
Shery, clinical psychology
Three Oaks Rd, Ste. 2A, Cary, IL 60013
1976, state-of-the-art counseling which treats the problem, not just the
degree: University of Southern California, 1975
Referrals accepted from Alexian Brothers, Good
Shepherd, Centegra, Loyola, Northwestern University, University of Chicago and the Mayo
Clinic hospitals and physicians.
Expert Evaluations for:
Anxiety - Depression -Marriage
- Alcohol -Substance Abuse -Anger - Fitness for Duty - Disability -Adoption - Weight Loss
Questions? Call Dr Mike NOW:
847 275 8236 (24
I am a psychologist and marriage counselor in the
Woodstock-Cary-Algonquin-Lake in the Hills and Crystal Lake area of Illinois. I find that there are 11 signs
that indicate you or your family members would benefit from counseling when going through a divorce or
What are these signs?
1. A relationship that is characterized
by numerous arguments and conflicts that are disruptive to the emotional status of family members
2. A relationship which is saturated
with strain, bitterness and tension just below the surface
3. When the talk of separation causes
fear and anxiety in family members which significantly degrades the quality of daily life
4. The childrens uncertainty and worry
about which ones will remain in the family home and which ones will re-locate
5. Children experiencing excessive
stress, agitation, acting-out or conflict about being separated from a parent or sibling
6. Parents who should be separated but
are still living under the same roof because of logistical or financial problems, thus causing increased
coldness and estrangement in the home
7. Conflicts, arguments and frustration
caused by a seriously compromised lifestyle engendered by financial stress caused by the expense of operating
Symptoms of acting-out,
depression, anxiety, fear, rage, substance abuse or poor school performance in family members
9. Anger, bitterness, arguments and
frustration caused by having to accommodate new step-parents, step-children or step-siblings
10. Child management and discipline problems that
result from single parenting or lack of cooperation from the ex-spouse
11. Children that appear to be experiencing some
guilt or anxiety for the marital failure
If you experience any of these issues, you can benefit from
counseling. But if you begin, what can your counseling accomplish? How will it benefit you?
1. You will learn how to nurture your
kids and reassure them that they are still loved and not responsible for the marital discord.
2. You will learn to develop flexible
living arrangements that meet your kids needs.
3. If you and your partner are still
living together, practical and clear guidelines will be set-up to keep the situation from getting more
4. You will discover how to integrate
new additions to the family resulting from remarriage or cohabitation.
5. You will develop a plan for
cooperative parenting that keeps you and your former spouse on the same page so conflicts can be
6. Your children will learn to accept
the break-up as independent from anything they have ever said or done.
7. Your therapist may prescribe daily
affirmations or motivating thoughts so that your subconscious mind really believes that you do not have to worry
about the separation. When your subconscious believes it, your everyday mind will follow and the anxiety will
10. The therapist may prescribe some articles or
books for you to read about surviving divorce and ask that you select relevant concepts to discuss in your
11. Your therapist will likely help you to develop an
awareness of your fear of independence triggers and constructive ways to manage them.
12. You may be asked to write about how your
unsatisfactory marriage contributed to your anxieties and those of your family members and how your divorced
state may enhance your emotional recovery and that of your children.
13. Your therapist will assist you in developing
insight into any personal or career changes that may be needed in order to maximize the success of your newly
separated living situation.
15. You may be encouraged to increase your awareness
of how your upbringing may have affected the way you behave in relationships. Often a traumatic past may linger
or even lurk into your present, thereby encouraging a pattern of dysfunctional relationships.
16. In helping you to manage a traumatic past, your
therapist may help you identify the role you played in your family, the feelings associated with it and the way
it may impact your current or future relationships.
17. The therapist may help you to identify
self-defeating patterns relevant to the way you operate in relationships and suggest ways of modifying them so
they are not repeated.
18. You will identify sources of ongoing support and
reassurance to help you in effectively curtailing and managing your anxiety about starting anew.
Dr. Mike Shery is a
licensed clinical psychologist and is affiliated
with almost all health plans, including: ValueOptions, Medicare, Cigna, Cigna Behavioral
Health, United Health Care, Aetna, First Health, Healthstar, Blue Cross Blue Shield of Illinois,
ComPsych, Magellan Health, HFN, Tricare, Humana, most union local plans, most school district
plans, Unicare, ChoiceCare, CAPP, Multiplan, Mental Health Network, Managed Health Network,
United Behavioral Health, PPONext, Private Health Care Systems, Humana-Military and Beech Street
He has practiced
clinical psychology for approximately 24 years and is board certified as a specialist in professional counseling by the International Academy of Behavioral
Medicine, Counseling and Psychotherapy. He is the director of Affiliated Counseling and
Referral Services and is a member of the American
The office is located
in Cary, IL and in select cases phone consultations are available for those who don’t live
locally> Telephone Counseling.
To make an
appointment> New Patient Registrationor to learn more about the psychological
services he providescall him at 1-847-275-8236 (24
To make an appointment, schedule
Click: Make appointment for Cary Office: Therapy and
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