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From Cary, IL: How Counseling Provides The Secrets To Flawless Communication And Marital Magic
Marriage counseling is about helping spouses stay together and fulfilled with their relationship- for the rest of their lives! Often when spouses consider marriage counseling, it is because they feel that their bond with each other has weakened or been broken.

Healthy dialogue and problem-solving techniques are the keys to the bonding in your relationship as they are to virtually any relationship. You, like others, must have effective open-ended problem-solving and communication skills when relating to each other in order for your relationship to last a lifetime.

Talk to your partner several times per day through the use of words or soothing and comforting touch. What if only you OR your partner wants to go to counseling as a couple?

Should the "uninterested" partner go too? Absolutely! After all, if your partner sees a problem, whether or not you do, it becomes your problem too because issues affecting your partner most likely, at least, in time, will affect you too.

Be sure to select a counselor with over ten years experience and a license to practice independently. Very sensitive topics such as sex, problem-solving, infidelity etc. are best discussed with a person of expertise in a professional setting in order to maximize objectivity and minimize defensiveness.

In counseling, it's important to focus on yourself, primarily, and then on your partner. It is the time to discuss tone of voice, open-mindedness and likes and dislikes when communicating with each other.

Be a diplomat, hold your temper and maintain eye contact with your spouse. Don't be sarcastic. Don't tease and don't trivialize what your partner says.

Go out of your way to show that you care about your partner's hurt feelings WITHOUT being defensive. Try to reconnect in a supportive manner, in a way that brings you closer together.

Remember that it is not always WHAT you say, but often HOW you say it. The goal is to be able to agree to disagree with true grace, sincerity and humor.

Keep the relationship diverse in the ability to accept one an others different views and flow with them with real poise. Reconnect with your partner in a way that far exceeds the sexual dimension of the relationship.

Though sex is still very important, when a couple connects on a psychological and emotional level it makes the bond much stronger. It gets a little closer to approximating the status of soul mates.

Spend quality time alone, together with your spouse, particularly if there are children in your home. However, even if there are no children, it is still crucial to take a vacation and get some away time together with your partner to play and just pleasantly pass the time with each other.

Consider marriage counseling as a real part of your life by going weekly for three to six months. Many times, your marriage counselor will ask questions to one or both of you that will bring out hidden, subconscious and truthful thoughts and feelings.

An experienced marriage counselor will help you get back on track with each other and, importantly, appreciate your partner's different perspective without getting defensive or taking it personally. The counseling process should assist you in knowing your partner in ways you previously didn't understand or appreciate.

It should help you discover what your spouse wants out of your relationship and, even, life itself. When searching for a marriage counselor, ask for referrals from your physician, minister or a good friend.

Listening to the recommendations of other couples who've previously consulted marriage counselors can be very revealing. A great recommendation is a very reliable sign that a professional therapist is trustworthy.

Firsthand accounts will often give you revealing insights into what you can expect from a particular marital therapist. Always check your therapist''s credentials; get one with a doctoral degree and a license to practice on his own.

Also, don't ever consult a psychologist or marriage therapist if you don't know from where he or she earned his or her degree.
Most importantly, select a therapist who is very experienced.

Don't forget the recommendations and insights gleaned from others who have been in therapy. If they refer you to someone in particular, it's an excellent sign that that professional is
trustworthy and very competent.
Dr Shery is in Cary, IL, near Algonquin, Crystal Lake, Marengo, Woodstock and Lake-in-the-Hills. He provides day, evening and Saturday appts, accepts all insurance and bills your insurance directly.
He provides an exclusive Peace of Mind Guarantee: "In the unlikely event your insurance fails to pay, neither will you!" Call 1 847 275 8236 (24 Hrs) or learn more at:

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How to Find the Right Counselor-the FIRST Time
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Algonquin, IL: Counseling Directory
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In-Office Services are located in Cary, Illinois and are convenient if you're coming from: 

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